Because I'm a mess.
I'm such a mess, and it's not even just for my appearance. This trip has taken a toll on me and I haven't been able to pull up my usual being.
Chase's seeing me at my worst, there's nothing he should be interested in. Not in me.
But... why am I even thinking about it? It's not like I am interested in him.
I'm not.
I'm just exhausted.
I haven't rested properly since leaving the city. How many days ago...?
The journey has really been a pain, having to fend for myself at every opportunity. Not that I don't know how or I'm not able to do so, but it has been hard nonetheless.
It has been lonely.
It has been- Don't even think about it!
Scary.
I have been scared, I should be able to be honest with myself.
This trip has scared me, and I'm not sure what's worse: the crumbled letter, its urgency, or my inability to find out who sent it, to understand most of what's written in it.
You can find a few other different phrases from this chapter on Medium, Inkspired, and Tumblr.
You can find the whole chapter in the Sapphire Azulino tier on Patreon 💙